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The parental house is upgraded, cleaned out and sold. Only one massive fight between me and the brother and just before my birthday too. It's enough to make me disown the buggerer. I suppose that's not bad considering some of the antics I've observed from other families estate free-for-alls. The Old Man can rest easy now that he's been proven right in that we'd fight. Don't even know if the Old Mam got buried yet, brother hasn't answered that question. Been 4 mo since I asked. Now that I've somewhat recovered from wrestling an old oak china cabinet up those stairs--with an unexpected assist from the downstairs neighbor, bless her--I need to drop off the u-haul truck and sniffle a bit over this life stage development..
Last edited by Griffinmoon (7/27/2020 9:24 am)
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Hugs, Griffi-ji. My father just passed a way (July 14th) and we're diving up his accumulated possessions. But since my full sibs and I were rather estranged from him, we really don't mind that the brothers from his second wife get the vast majority. I just want a polished stone egg of his and the rest can go to the half sibs, no skin off my nose.
I hope you recover from your epic transition.
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Did all that lifting and heaving in 90 F/high humidity weather. Man was *that* fun. Tempted as I am to disown the brother, I find I'm concerned about his appearance: *big* weight gain since Christmas and that's not how our family runs: we tend to be skinny by genetics. Active as he is, he was still out of breath & wimpy while on-loading. He's 3+ yrs. younger than me. My impression is that he's get a wicked case of stress--and isn't handling it correctly. Perhaps that will improve/get less now that the house is over and done with. He let slip that his step-daughter is now officially out of the house and setting up her life about 1 hr. away. So *that's* out of his hair now too.
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There is definitely a lot of stress relief once everything is done. My brother and I did Dad's house in July of last year, it took us nearly 2 weeks to get everything out, and yes, it was hot. On a positive note, I got notice from the IRS that Dad's final income tax return has been processed and approved, and the check will be mailed out this week. I understand the IRS is adding some interest due to the delays caused by their office being shut down. As soon as I get the check and deposit it, I can tell the lawyer, and we can finish the probate and divide the money to the heirs.
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Not sure NY does probate on all occasions. Don't think that's the case with our family estate. It's all Living trust, my brother is executor and I'm just along for the ride. The biggest glitch is getting assorted authorities to recognize the brother as the new owner of the Trust, even though both of us are the beneficiaries. That's as much as my head can encompass of the legalese involved..
Last edited by Griffinmoon (7/28/2020 9:38 pm)
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We tried to get our Dad to change his will over to a living revocable trust, but he refused and wouldn't discuss it. Mainly because he didn't understand it, and was afraid that it would end up being more of a hassle for us than it really was. I spoke with an estate lawyer last winter and set up my own estate as a trust. Cost a bit of money, but it's a one-time fee, and it encompassed my house, my car, all of my financial assets, and had a healthcare POA, Living Will, and my will, all in one neat package. My brother will have access to all of that if he needs it when he needs it, but it takes a big burden off my shoulders, because I have no direct descendants of my own, so the estate will be equally divided among my nieces and nephews.
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joe nandi:
That's my plan also when I get my cut of the estate. Not that I've got a whole lot to put into such a thing, but it'll keep NYS's hands off what little there is/will be.
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By putting all your stuff into a revocable trust you maintain control over what you own and your heirs avoid probate when you die. Probate can take forever.
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smartcat nadi: exactly.
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